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Hello everybody, my name is Markiplier and welcome to Google Feud. The game where YOU try to guess what Google is gonna guess when YOU’RE trying to look up porn. Unless you’re not looking up porn.. and if you’re not, what’re you doing with your life? Come on! What else is the internet for? So, my favorite category is ‘people’ and not any of the other ones. I’ll do the other ones to show you what they are, but my favorite is people, because they’re relatable human problems, that we humans have to experience, in our hu-man lives, with our hu-man limbs! ‘Never put a’.. dick in your butt! *Giggling* Dammit, God damn it.. I told myself I wasn’t gonna start it off this way! ‘NEVER PUT A QUESTION MARK WHERE GOD’?! ‘NEVER PUT A HAT ON YOUR BED’?? ‘NEVER PUT A SOCK IN A TOASTER’? WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?? I JUST said this was #relatable bullshit! You’re gonna give me THIS assetry? Fuck off, Google. ‘How to look’ ..handsome. Fuck. ‘How to look’ beeaautiful. FUCK. ‘HOW TO LOOK’ HOT. God, I gotta know what the internet wants. I gotta speak the internet lingo! It’s very simplistic language! ‘How to look’… less stupid. ‘How to look’ cool! Also known as less stupid. BAM! OOOOOOH, FUCK OFF! ‘How to look older, pretty, younger, skinny’.. [laughing] ‘for bed bugs’.. ‘Like a model’? this is bullshit. ‘I wanna buy a [singing] SNOWMAAN! Fuck. I wanna buy a car! I wanna buy a house! I wanna buy a dog! I wanna buy a cat! Fuck.. I wanna buy a… [giggling] sibling [laughing] I wanna buy… I WANNA BUY A WIFE! DAMN IT! ‘I wanna buy a timeshare.. gun, boat.. tin-‘ Tiny! Tiny house! I wanna buy an itty bitty house, for Tiny Box Tim to live in. Just an itty bitty one! It’ll be adorable! ‘My best friend is a’ [singing] SNOWMAN! ‘My best friend is’ an asshole. Aw fuck, come on. [laughing] That makes me look bad, oh no! ‘My best friend is a’ cool guy. [laughing] Damn it. ‘Is a guy, girl’ who- Why would you need to look this up?? This isn’t a Google worthy phrase! Alright, fine. You know what, whatever. ‘MY FRIENDS ARE ALL’ ..dead. [laughing] Oh my God.. oh my God, that was one of ’em.. ‘My friends are all’ jerks. ‘My friends are all’… ..cooler than I am! Man, this is talking about my friends a lot. ‘My friends are all’.. …mean! Fuck.. ‘Wasted’? ‘Wasted and I hate this club’? God, I gotta think more millennial. I gotta be more millennial on this.. ‘How to draw a’ [singing] SNOWMAN! STICK FIGURE! …HAND! FUCK! ‘Rose’?!?!?! ‘How to get rich off’.. …of stupid people! ‘Off’.. the internet! ‘How to get rich off’ [evil voice] YOUR FAMILY. Eh.. ‘How to get rich off’ of exploiting slave labor! I gotta spell it right! NOO.. ‘stocks, YouTube, penny stocks’.. Fuck! ‘Best way to kill’ time! wwhAAT? ‘Best way to kill’ your family! ‘Best way to kill’ your wIFE! God, damn it, I’m terrible! Oh my God! That was all logical things! [laughing] What was I doing!? Why was I defaulting to murder?! ‘I love the feeling of being’….. *silence* [cough] [laughing] Okay, alright then. ‘I love the’- [whispering] taste of semen. [uncontrollable giggling] [giggling] ‘I love the taste of’ (Jack’s) dick.. Damn it! [laughing] Wrong both times! ‘I love the taste of’ [evil voice] blood.. YEAHAHAH! hhaAAAAAAH, ‘I love the taste ooooof’..meat. Damn it. [laughing] ‘I love the taste of balls’! I was so close! Oh my God.. [giggling] I was on the right track.. I didn’t know how close I was. That is so stupid.. It’s so stupid, I’m sorry, that’s so stupid. ‘I accidentally ate’ [laughing] Jeff Goldblum.. That’s not how you spell his name, damn it.. ‘I accidentally ate’ Adam Sandler.. ‘I accidentally ate’ balls.. [distress] OH NO! I ACCIDENTALLY ATE GLUTEN?!?! AW, FUCK, MAN! ‘I think I have’ an erection. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ‘I think I have’ a tumor. ‘I think I have’ cancer.. ‘I think I have’… [uncontrollable giggling] a pet named ‘Steve’.. [ffs mark now everyone made it a trend] (DAMMIT MARK NOW IT’S A MEME!) [Chica will not be happy about this…] I don’t, I don’t know why that really made me laugh.. I’m in a very giggly mood, okay? ‘I wanna be a’ [singing] snowman! I wanna be a’ marine, ‘I wanna be an’ [laughing] engineer.. God damn it. Ohh, ‘I wanna be a millionare’ that’s obvious, that’s obvious. ‘I think I swallowed a’ penis. ‘I think I swallowed a’ my pet named ‘Steve’.. [uncontrollable giggling] I’m sorry, I- this is not funny! This is not funny, I know this! Oh man.. I know! Fuck, man, I’m sorry! ..a nail. Damn it. ‘I think I swallowed’ oh, ‘a chicken bone’, ‘piece of glass’, that, that makes sense. ‘What’s it like to be’ gay? ‘What’s it like to be’ a girl? ‘What’s it like to be’ [laughing] a pet named ‘Steve’? (here we go again) [uncontrollable laughter] [cry-laughing] God, that’s so not funny, that’s so not funny. I’m going out of my God damned mind… ‘When you die, you die for real. ‘you die’ in the game? ‘When you die, you’ go to heavaan? Heaven? ‘When you die, you [Darkiplier] go to hell. [Mark] Damn it! [laughing] ‘When you die, you become a tree’ You just, become a great beautiful tree.. Oh man.. I’m sorry. I am so sorry. I am so- I am sorry for this video, I am sorry for being a God damn giggly fool.. I- and you can play this game through the link in the description below. Thank you everybody so much for watching, if you want to see more of this let me know, I might explore the other categories but so far people’s my favorite. So thanks again everybody for watching, and as always, I will see you in the next video. BUH-BYE! ( Caption maker names in description)

100 Replies to “CAN’T STOP LAUGHING!! | Google Feud”

  1. Axxthetic_ dark.vibez says:

    They have a pet name Steve now,

  2. daweirdguylol3 bland says:

    anus anus anus ANUS

  3. Theresa Claypoole says:

    Im not searching up porn I'm searching up FIX MY DEPRESSION

  4. HappyLarry says:

    Completely ignored 4:05 "I love the taste of come"

  5. Congolese Gorilla Centaur says:

    Never put a question mark where god.
    Never put a lid on god.
    WTAF. Who was googling that stuff; retarded elementary school kids.

  6. Fast and Night furious says:

    5:59 what autism does to you varies from what type you have and also how much it affects you. Personally I have Asperges which makes it difficult for me to understand emotion and loud noises are a problem for me but there are certain benefits to having autism like having a photographic memory and some autistic people (including me) can actually register more information making their reactions quicker and it also makes them better at mathematical equations. Some people will need help their entire lives and some like me are almost perfectly capable. It also makes situations seem more chaotic for them and information has amplified effects which makes autistic people extremely unpredictable sometimes.

  7. Oliver Hansen says:

    He should've said "i love the taste og come "instead og semen

  8. Ella Juroku says:

    I love Giggle Mark!

  9. TheGalacticDianond YT says:

    If you put captions he says:
    "I love the taste of (Jack's) Dick"

  10. DraTrav says:

    2:34 ok boomer

  11. Epic gamer H says:

    Mark goes from cancer to a pet named Steve

  12. Person Who Does Things says:

    New title: “Grown man laughs a little too hard because of own s*x-jokes”

  13. Azrura says:

    It goes from "best way to kill time" to "best way to kill your family" in under five seconds.
    Think about that.

  14. Jasmine Slater says:

    His laughter is so contagious and he's just so full of energy! I love it

  15. IWillGame says:

    Best way to kill: your family/wife Mark:Those were all logical things!!

  16. Angzs Le says:

    I don't know why I keep watching this because everytime I watch this I cry in laughter

  17. JonnesTT says:

    Mark: I gotta think more Millenial me: … Do I really have to?
    My body: ye
    Me: OK BOOMER!

  18. Lilli Tuohy says:

    I love his hair and his laugh 😆

  19. Unknown-User says:

    I think i have:

    A uti
    Lupus “Its never lupus!”

  20. EllinorGamer Gunnarsson says:

    mark: i think i swallowed my pet named steve! NOOOOOOO he was my best friend!
    me: oh hey mark i have your pet named steve right here.

    The funny thing is i had text bellow and when he said like this "i love the taste of dick laughing and giggling well the text said: i love the taste of jack's dick me reading that: Looks like mark is being fucked after all xD

  21. Charlie Smith says:

    Best video ever I Keep on laughing 10/10

  22. Layla Symons says:

    The captions tho "I love the tastes of (Jack's) dick" 😂

  23. Anna Lotus says:

    princess anna be like “my best friend is a snowman”

  24. Crit Goddess says:

    "Whats it is liked being a pet named steve" that just got me laughing 🤣😂

  25. Prancing Corn98 says:


  26. That One Gurl says:


  27. ban2_game_lover says:

    2:24 gay

  28. I See You says:

    3:38 turn on subs

  29. Nightmare Funtime Freddy says:

    Go to 3:38 with captions.🤔🤔

  30. William Walker says:

    I played and couldn't stop laughing because it said I wish I were a ______. And I said snowman and it was the first answer

  31. toby 147 says:

    Exiting you doing that you can't do it in the morning

  32. Olivia Borchersen says:

    Me one minut in the video* its not funny😑 me when its abaut to end*hahahahahahahahahah!!!!!!!*

  33. Melted Rainbowz says:

    This video cracked me up too much, thank you for this 😂😂😂😂

  34. Strange Ignorant says:

    Try To Do Try Not To Laugh On This

  35. Aiden Gaming says:

    Is my pet guinea pig gay?

    number one


  36. WindowsXPMapping1 says:

    one of the answers was come

  37. Quinn McLego says:

    Maniacal laughter increases.

  38. Jayyy :D says:

    a pet named steve

  39. Caitlin Kennedy says:

    I swear to god- turn your captions on at 3:39–

  40. IKONIK CLAN says:

    This is illegal😂😂😂😂 and demonitizd 😂😂😂😂😂😂 i spelled it wrong

  41. Corruption - 228 says:

    Um… Am Steve… JK

  42. BbMonkey 803 says:

    When I played google fued it said I lied to my… and I put my pet named Steve and got 10,000 points

  43. McKinzee Malott says:

    Markiplyer isnt ok, send help

  44. Emily Krey says:

    It’s 2019 and I still sometimes come back to this video when I’m having a bad day. Thanks for this

  45. Lillian Panter says:

    I think he was drunk while filming this🤣

  46. Etlleyog Minecraft says:

    5:58 its amazing to be autistic i know because i am

  47. Cloud Dropper101 says:

    Dude i went on google feud and this one said "i lied about…" And i put my pet named steve andnit worked

  48. Sonicprogamer 101 says:

    I think I’ve gone crossed eyed 😂

  49. Antho TGL says:

    What’s it like to be a pet named Steve! I died.

  50. Kyndell Pitcock says:

    is your best friend jacksepticeye!!! lol

  51. Donna Malin says:

    I think i swallowed a tumor
    From the laughing of course

  52. Simple Retro says:

    Looked up “never put a”. It’s 2019, almost 2020, and genie on a budget is still autocompleted

  53. 1998 Chevy Impala says:

    Whenever I think of 'A Pet Named Steve' I think of a furball that some homeless person named Steve

  54. TW videos says:

    Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand here we go.

  55. Raven Martinez says:

    Go to 3:39 and turn on subtitles
    Looks like someone ships it

  56. neonAnarchist says:

    I too, love the taste of napalm in the morning.

  57. kitty studio's says:

    When my friends grandpa died in front of him he ran out of the room because he died then farted

  58. Anything Happy Death Day says:

    Bruh, when I watched this video I laughed so hard, my throat hurt

  59. dulguun odmandal says:

    3 years ago.

  60. Nat Louise says:

    But It funny Mark

  61. WoomyBrawl Real says:


  62. hayden garwood says:

    My teacher has a pet named Steve

  63. Big Icy says:

    I have a feeling that Mark does porn

  64. Curtis Anderson says:

    I too love the taste of napalm in the morning.

  65. Tanni Lavulavu says:

    why did it say i like the taste of balls lmao

  66. Dương Trần says:

    This is so stupid 😂😂

  67. GötzeLP2 says:

    If you die you become. now i know how to help Mr Beast

  68. sander sides fan says:

    🤣🤣😭🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣OMG a pet named Steve!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  69. Lilly like da flower says:

    I think I swallowed a pet named Steve

  70. Catte Official says:


  71. Ruby Rose says:


    Guess what all of these have in common

  72. Shadie Lonnie says:

    How tall r u

  73. vorq says:

    Whats it like to be a….


  74. X Faceless says:

    1:34 I can tell ya where to buy one if you don't mind her screaming an trying to get away also website ends in the .Onion
    3:24 wtf! 😂

  75. X Faceless says:

    Darkiplier is showing 😂

  76. Lol Gaming says:

    …a pet named steve…

  77. Crina Trufelea says:

    3:24 gcha bitch

  78. SunnyKinz3 says:


  79. Dragon Slayer says:

    Calm down with steve he might feel….. loved

  80. Penny Chmielewski says:

    6 16 if you look over it says bye bye

  81. Purebred noodle says:

    If I need to cry, I watch these videos. Because I laugh so hard at a pet named steve

  82. Firak 398 says:


  83. Ray Tats says:

    I feel like he read a septiplier fanfiction before he recorded this vid😂

  84. German Ball [AIO] says:

    6:19 When you die you die

  85. Let's Player Dimon says:

    markiplier: I think i have a…
    Mark's head: A PET NAMED STEVE!!
    Why not, cool meme (^ u ^)

  86. super rebel says:

    LOL (DIES)

  87. The Joker says:

    Mark: How to look…..
    Me: Straight.
    Mark: Less stupid.


  88. Jacob gamer says:

    Everyone we have to spam google with a a pet named Steve and then it will be an option

  89. Papyrus The Skeleton says:

    Always put a sock in the toaster so they are toasty when you put them on in the winter!!

  90. RedNinja629 says:

    Here, take a look inside Markiplier's mind:

  91. Nutellzz says:

    Did anyone tell him that "All my friends are dead" is a song? people aren't just telling Google that all their friends are dead lol

  92. PotatoMan says:

    What google hates

    •pets named steve

  93. ThatThetaGuy says:

    after watching this video, im glad google didnt buy family feud

  94. The awesome Bab says:

    tiny box tim has become a signature and all of it started here

  95. Luigi Badjing says:

    2:36 How to draw a snowman

  96. Alizée says:

    coming here in 2019 cause i wanna show the vid to a friend

    mark : you die in the game

    me : the game..? ooh f*ck i lost

    you too now

  97. Molly the potato says:

    My friends are all dead
    Google are you trying to tell us something?

  98. ProjektPoison Inside Outside Vlogs says:

    Mark:"I lOvE tHe TasTE of BaLLs"

  99. Bonnet :3 says:

    How is this not age restricted XD I love this tho XD

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